Uncertainty is the only thing that is certain in this life. That is what I have learned over the last couple of weeks, and most of the time I am okay with it, but there are other times where I feel a little overwhelmed. If I'm not worried about dating, then I'm worried about driving or my job or my writing or inadequacy....there's a ton. I don't like feeling this way, but especially as a single person, I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to be doing, and I'm trying to figure that out and do my best, but I wonder if I'm doing enough.
My life has been anything but a "cookie cutter" plan, and I kind of enjoy it, but it's also very difficult to understand sometimes when others do not support me in it. I've never done anything that would make others wonder if I'm going to dive off the deep end or cause suffering to others--Why would they question that now? I'm 26 years old, and I haven't gone crazy yet (Well, that's not necessarily true, I guess. I am just crazy enough to get what I want out of life, like publishing my book or my England trip.), but I do need to move forward.
Since the men my age are not helping themselves at all, I have to move on and move forward with my life. That is what I am trying to figure out. Since I have no idea when I will be married or have children, I must still live my life in a fulfilled way. If I didn't I would look back on my life wondering, or worse, with regret. Why is that so hard to understand for people who have a different path than I do--especially the married people or people with children who have no understanding of singlehood because they were married young? Or for those that did have a long singlehood, why are they opposed to me, of all the people?
Sorry, I just had to rant there. Just keep in mind we all have different paths in this life, and sometimes when things get to be a little too much or you have no idea where to turn, turn to God. He'll listen and understand, even if no one else will or wants to. He'll help you find ways to be happy and peaceful in the hardship of not knowing.
3 years ago